The Art of Letting Go

The struggle with effort

Sometimes, in our quest for success—whether in learning a language, fitting in, or mastering a new skill—we try way too hard. What we don’t realize is that in some cases, the harder we pull, the tougher it gets. It’s like telling a dog to drop the stick—the more you tug, the harder they pull. Sometimes, you need to stop pulling for anything to shift.

The language learning dilemma

Language acquisition can quickly become frustrating if we focus too much on the effort rather than the experience. Trying too hard to memorize single-word vocabulary or grammar rules often leads to stress and anxiety rather than improved fluency. Did you know that a significant part of learning a language happens subconsciously?! That means the times when you relax and just let the language wash over you—watching movies or listening to music - especially when you aren't paying too much attention —can often lead to better results! Surrounding yourself with the sound of language activates all kinds of neural pathways.

Neurodiversity and the Art of letting Go

If you are neurodivergent and think differently, you can often feel pressured to conform to societal norms. Whether in the classroom - where you are too distracted - or at work, when speaking your mind in places where people like to express themselves wrapped in jargon to disguise their power plays or hidden agendas. Trying too hard to fit in can lead to a sense of disconnection, frustration, and depression. It can can have severe consequences to 'hide your true self' or 'wear the appropriate mask,' because you are cutting yourself off from you. Try to find environments that celebrate who you really are, instead of focusing on who you should be to fit in. Let go of other people's opinions about you!

Finding the balance: pulling vs. letting go

Sometimes we are the dog AND the person: caught in a tug-of-war with ourselves. Stuck in our own mind with doubt on the one hand, yet a persistent "we should keep trying" on the other. While ambition and hard work can set the foundation for success, the magic often happens when we take a step back. By letting go, we give ourselves the freedom to see what happens and feel whether this is what we really want.. When there is freedom to explore, to learn at our own pace, we are not only happier: we are also more effective in getting to where we want to go.

Sometimes less is more

Letting go doesn’t mean giving up; it means giving yourself the freedom to take a break and see what happens. Whether in learning a (new) language, or in social situations where you might not fit in. Take a step back and don't rely on effort only. Usually, the stick is dropped right after you stop pulling.